TIME
*I had a diagram but it wouldn’t work so you will have to use your imagination. I hope the foot notes work. also this one is pretty fucking dumb
The world was flat, for the longest time, until we had to go and make it round. And time was straight and fast, once: like an arrow or a river of piss streaming from godâs dick. But we went and took time and bent that back âround on its self and made it round too.
There were two people, a boy and a girl, on their third or fourth date. And having fucked adequately on the 2nd date there was no pretense between them. Their companionship easy and comfortable. The boy, unfortunately, found himself falling in love with this girl, as boys do. It is unfortunate because she is killed in a home invasion one night when he is playing squash with some guys from work.
The killer took little: a six pack of beer, some change from the jar that was for the laundromat. There was nothing else of value except for a life. The killer took that too.
The boy, whose name was john, went home from squash and showered, paying special attention to his genitals. Later, as they had planned, john would message the girl, whose name was Kim. She never answered, of course, because she was dead (dying actually, at this point). John waited for a few hours for Kimâs response, and when it never came he said to himself: âShe was just a slut.â Then he jerked off and went to bed. When he never heard from Kim again, john chalked the whole think up to a fizzled relationship with a girl who was âjust a slut.â [1]
Kim has left the timeplane that john, and everyone else on johnâs timeplane exist on, and jumped to a new and (relatively) skewed timeplane. These jumps also are conceptual, as in conception: right at the moment of her death, Kim was conceived on another timeplane. There might be a john on this timeplane, there might not, and he might arrive on it later.[2],[3]
For most people each new time plane is unique in such a way that there will never be the familiarity of âI have been here done thatâ not for john, john is an anomaly. He is a node, doomed to repeat the same plane for all âeternity.â
It is hard to talk about time in a nonlinear fashion, in truth all Johns and Kimâs are on their timeplane simultaneously[4]. If all of Kimâs timeplanes superimposed on each other would look like an image of static. Not for john though. He is an anomaly, his image would look like a photo of a river taken with a long exposure. But for ease of discussion time will be discussed in a linear fashion
Poor John, doomed to live the same life infinite times. Free will exists, in the same way that a swimmer might navigate a furious river. In the end they will be washed down stream regardless of the choices they make.
After his 10100 repetition of living the same life john starts to get some serious dĂ©jĂ vu. Most people donât get this, again, they are bouncing around in different lives on different worlds and eras and all that jazz. Not john. His life is the same and itâs slowly eroding the walls of his furious river.
One john starts to make a machine.[5] A machine to see the invisible spectrum of time. Obviously this fails. (Meanwhile[6] Â one Kim has met a Steve, and his happily married with kids, oblivious that one of her selves has been brutally murdered for some laundry[7] change on johnâs recurrent timeplane).
But tinkering has always been the most effective method of progress. And tiny little bits on knowledge are imparted on the infinite other Johnâs also building this time observation device. This is prototyping on a massive scale
Observation is an interesting thing. Things change simply by being observed: electrons passing through a double slit, or a human, or the hair on the nape of a neck. Thus it would follow that time also changes when itâs being observed.
Oh look! A john has done it, he has made a time observation device. He turns it on! Oops he has kicked himself (and all other johns, simultaneously) out of time. Â And now time, being observed, doesnât act in such an infinite manner. Essentially it stops being a constantly changing spectrum and becomes fixed. And everyone and everything is frozen in time appearing to john like nothing more than a rainbow.
[1] In fact Kim was looking forward to spending the night with John and was expecting it to be filled with sex, passion, and fun. Therefore she had also payed special attention to her genitals.
[2] Unlikely that john exists or will show up as there are infinite planes and infinite angles of skew along infinite dimensions (i.e.: a very big infinite amount of timeplanes.)
[3] For ease of discussion time is being considered linear here.
[4] In fact timplanes are part of an even bigger wave system. Similar to visible light on the electromagnetic spectrum.
[5] This may seem startling, but there are an infinite number of johns experiencing deprivating dĂ©jĂ vu. This leads to the idea that perhaps time is not a âone time only linear thingâ
[6] Authors joke
[7] In fact the laundry problem has long since been solved on this timeplane
sunnyanddelightful 